The Endless Shenanigans of the "Fairer" Sex
Hi, it's me, Typical Girl, how are you? I'm awesome thanks for asking (and for validating me like everyone else does) So what are we doing tonight? (I hope whatever it is, it costs a lot of money!) Oh, dinner, awesome! (I hope it's somewhere and cool where the waiters aren't friendly and the food is overpriced, but I'm not eating much anyway so I guess it doesn't matter. I'll wait until you drop me off and then stuff my face in private while the or so dudes that I'm "talking to" can engage in stroking my ego while I gorge on something totally delicious and unhealthy in the privacy of my own apartment) Don't you love my apartment? Take a look around! (I'm so cool for having all these pictures of me and my equally mindless friends squishing our faces together and showing off shitty booze, because we're just so incredibly awesome!) I'm just going to finish getting ready (because I never know who I might run into when I'm out with you) **ten minutes later** thanks for waiting (I could've finished faster, but I think it's cool that you'd wait for me. After all, having a AND a pulse makes me super special! Just ask all my creepy followers who I keep around when I need a little ego boost when I'm not out being a skank!) Oooh, nice car! (I totally might suck you off now, or at least consider it) ** ** sorry, my phone just keeps going off, let me put it on silent (or just send every guy who's trying to bone me a mass text saying sorry I'm busy for a little while, txt me later :) Don't you just love text messaging? I know it's kind of annoying sometimes but I can't live without it! (how else would I massage my ego?!? It's not even a phone anymore, it's a personal sex arranging device!) **at the restaurant** Oh wow, this place looks so good (Some internet guy brought me here when I signed up on one of those sites where old guys bang girls for money, but I'd never admit to that. I really *liked* him...) **after the meal** That was delicious! (I totally can't wait for the drive-thru at dees. I'm going to stuff my face.) Hey can we go to such-and-such bar for a drink? (you're buying, and I might run into some meatheads who want to pound me silly!) **after the bar** Thanks for the drinks! (all of them, because I'm secretly a lush) I had a great time tonight! (using you for everything BUT sex) *kiss on the cheek* let's do this again soon! (when I need to get drunk on someone else's dime! I'm off to go respond to the or so dudes who are vying to bang me once or twice, until they realize they're too drunk to actually have *good* sex, but I'm and brainless so I don't really know better yet!)